Getting Clean In A Flash

Transcribed By Rad


The Story

Our team was hired to take out a drone/weapons factory tonight. The idea was to put them out of commission for at least a few months. After doing the obligatory legwork, we tossed around numerous plans of attack—then I had a stroke of genius…

…evil genius.

I had specifically asked for info on the utilities (water/sewer/ect) around and under the facility, thinking we might float charges downstream and sink the place like Venice meets Krakatoa, (we have a lot of explosives) or at least disrupt service as a distraction.

Instead, we set careful charges in the sewer lines surrounding the facility, hacked their communications, and the security cameras for the entire block.

After moving a safe distance away in our fully-stealthed amphibious citymaster, we detonated the explosives and started recording the camera feeds. The blast-wave caused multiple tsunami's of wastewater to converge below the facility and burst up through the pipes, flooding the factory and sending one poor worker on the ride of his life as the toilet he was using rocketed into the air and then dumped him in a pool of filth.

Naturally, the factory called for a cleaning crew.

We intercepted the call and routed it to a burner commlink bought specifically for this purpose. Posing as a disaster cleanup service specializing in high-security facilities, our face got us the job, and the access codes for everything—including the secure areas. We told them we'd need a few hours to gather men and supplies, since it was such a big job…

…meanwhile, our technomancer is hijacking a fleet of cleaning drones from a local mall. They drive into the parking garage, whose cameras are mysteriously not working, and disappear. Surely they weren't loaded into an invisible citymaster no one saw leave.

Fun fact: Cleaning drones have a 10 liter fluid capacity for the cleansers they spray upon various surfaces. 1 liter of liquid explosives is equivalent to 1 kg of plastic explosives when calculating damage.

You can see where this is going.

Unfortunately, we had to leave before completing the scene, so I can't tell you how this ends yet. When we left off, our chameleon coated van had pulled up outside the factory, displaying the logo of our fake cleaning company: Jiffy Clean. Our motto? We get the job done in a flash.

Security guards escorted us into the facility, all of us in hazmat suits and our team wearing nanopaste disguises under. We've set the drones to work spraying down the equipment, and left for the night, informing the guards that the drones clean automatically, without wireless link, to ensure our clients privacy. One of the many security conscious features of Jiffy Clean service. The chemicals we use are somewhat hazardous, so no one should go in there until we come back tuesday to pick up the drones.

The truth is, we already have full blueprints of the facility, and have programmed the drones to hose the whole place down, then detonate the explosives. When they call Jiffy Clean back, they will receive a recorded message from the (now abandoned) burner commlink:

"Thank you for using Jiffy Clean, like our motto says: We get the job done in a flash."

As for the surveillance footage we recorded? We're going to send it to "6th World's Funniest Videos" (under a cover identity) and try to win 10,000 nuyen.gif The footage of the explosion we're selling to "Matrix's Most Amazing Videos".

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